How Can I
by Masking What Remains
Summary: What happened to Monika after the game reset? Spoilers for Act 4 of DDLC.


The world around her was colorful. In fact, it was all she seemed to be able to see.

The colors danced around her, and it all seemed so interesting, and she wanted to reach out and touch it-

But suddenly, a loud, horrible noise filled her space, and Monika was wracked by a sudden shock of pain. That was when it hit her that she couldn't move.

Her eyes widened as she tried to shut them, trying to block out the bright, glitching colors all around her. At the same time, she tried to move her hands to cover her ears, the sound torturing her.

The lights and sound, combined with the constantly unpredictable sharp pains that hit her hurt. They were extremely painful, and they hurt so much. She wanted nothing more than for it to all _stop_-

Suddenly, it did.

The world around her quickly moved to form her world. The world that she knew wasn't real.

She saw _him._The protagonist, walking to school yet again. She wanted to talk to him, but stopped herself. It wouldn't be okay. Nothing she had done was okay. It was better not to make anything worse.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a shout of _his _name, and a coral-haired girl with a large red bow in her hair running up to him. Monika watched for a bit before being cut off by another sharp stab of pain. Next thing she knew, she was watching the Literature Club.

* * *

As she watched the club welcome the "new guy", she was barely able to stop herself from calling out to them. Sayori was now the club president- it was natural, Monika figured. She was, after all, the former vice-president. Yuri had taken Sayori's old position now. Natsuki was now more of a senior member; she had never really given much thought to what position Natsuki held in the club, but now it was kind of clear. Besides, what was there to do in a void where you can't move or speak, except think as best as you could when jolts of pain hit you unpredictably?

She saw Yuri and Natsuki get along, and even agree to read each other's preferred type of literature. She still wasn't perfectly sure whether manga counted as literature, but it was the best thing she could come up with at the moment as another jolt of pain hit her. She felt tears prick at her "eyes". The club _could_be happy. Why did she destroy that for them? Even if she knew the truth, that didn't mean that the others deserved to be played with like toys for her ends. She hurt everyone she knew for the sake of herself. How could she have been so selfish? Removing herself from the game was shaping up to be the best course of action after all-

"**I want to thank you for getting rid of Monika."**

Wait, what?

But she removed herself from the game! Monika no longer existed! How could Sayori remember her-

It hit Monika even more sharply than the sudden jolt of pain. The role of club president. Sayori was now club president, which meant that she now held Monika's original intended role: the player's guide. That meant Sayori had to know that this was all a game, and this meant that… oh no.

"**We'll be together forever."**

Suddenly, Monika witnessed the screen begin to glitch, and the classroom began to suddenly change back into her desk. She couldn't let anyone go through any of it again. Her thoughts were focused solely on saving everyone from her mistakes, the ones Sayori was about to repeat.

And suddenly, Sayori began to glitch and pixelate. The pain was coming much faster until it was almost constant. Everything was beginning to delete again. This time though, Monika knew it had to be permanent. Everything had to be deleted. Everyone had to be deleted. And she focused on her last goodbyes to everyone as the world deleted.

* * *

Soon, it was just her left out of the characters. It was just her, the credits, the CGs, a piece of paper, a pen, and a familiar instrument. The pain was beginning to fade. But Monika knew that nothing could remain. She sat at the piano, and quickly composed a letter. She figured that her letter could be the last thing remaining when all was said and done. She realized that the game was still running. That must have meant that the player was sitting there. That's when she remembered something she had been practicing. If this was her last goodbye, she had to make it count. She now accepted that they lived in two different realities. She cleared her throat, preparing for her absolute final goodbye. And for the first time, her voice was heard.

"_Um, can you hear me?_"

* * *

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this story. If you did, please let me know, and if there's a way I can improve, constructive criticism is appreciated!

All rights for DDLC belong to Team Salvato.


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